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What It Means When You Are Still Angry At An Ex.
What It Means When You Are Still Angry At An Ex.
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There are some people whose mood instantly changes at the mention of their Ex. When they narrate how they were treated in a previous relationship, they carry on and on without realising that they are still talking about that new Ex for over an hour.
To make it worse, they forget how long they have been talking about that Ex, from one reason to the other, they immediately narrated how they were offended, and maltreatment by the former partner.
They always add that they have moved on or forgiven, but they always maintain that hurting expression, that hurting tone when they talk about that person.
They call them names and try to make them look bad to anyone who cares to listen. The story might be true, but the feeling they experienced, the heartbreak they experienced, the heartache that the relationship brought them, is still felt whenever the story is being told.
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The major significance of this situation is that whenever you tell this story, you tell it with so much pain, you are hurtful and hurting, you are still angry and hold grudges or resentment towards the Ex.
You don’t tell the story with relief that the relationship has finally ended, instead, it comes off as if you still miss this person you were once in a relationship with, you are hurting from realising how much deceit you were put through.
But in our daily life, in our day-to-day routines, what does it mean? What does it mean when you still speak of an Ex, with so much resentment and hate? It is almost as if you are ready to attack them when next you come across them.
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First of all, it is not a crime to still feel a certain way towards an Ex, because some people are friends with their Ex-partner, while some others can no longer even breathe the same air with an ex, meaning that they can no longer be found under the same roof with an Ex-partner.
Now not everyone dislikes their Ex. Not everyone can stand their Ex. So, it is normal to find people who feel something for their ex-lover, and that is not hate. Some people still love their exes, and whatever has been done to them, is not withstanding.
So in a case where you find yourself feeling something that ain’t a clear love for a person who once loved, but you find yourself feeling anger, feeling cheated, feeling an unbearable resentment towards that person, then you must realise that you most probably do like that person.
It is not a thing to deny, not a thing to feel embarrassed about, not a thing to fight over. When you are sitting on your own, no one talking to you, no one forcing you to accept or acknowledge the feelings you have, you just search yourself, your soul, and your heart.
You ask yourself if the anger you feel towards the Ex-lover is a result of what has been done to you, the deceit, the unpleasant experience, or because the person took your love for granted,
the person took advantage of your love and good heart and wasted your time in life, especially if this was in a marriage, where you thought you had finally found the one, and have settled to build your family with this person, but it turns out that the person deceived you, but that deceit doesn’t directly translate to lack of love.
It is very possible to be angry with the person you still love. It is okay to love a person who hurt you. It is even natural to want to have that person back.
You want them back, acknowledge their wrongdoing, and promise to do right by you. This will fill your longing heart, and satisfy your loving heart. Although we all feel love for a person, place or thing, it is not always reciprocated.
Some people send out more love than they receive. So often they feel like they have been cursed by nature because they never get the same love they give out. So when they think this way, and come across yet another love, that turns sour, they show this in nothing but anger.
They were hoping that this would be the one, the one who would love them the way they have loved every one, but just like they feared, this turns out to be just like the others. A partner takes advantage of their love.
This group of people can simply accept their fate, thinking they will never find true love, no matter how much love they give out, because it seems like everyone is taking advantage of their love.
So they bottle up an undiluted resentment for their Ex, who they know, they loved so much.
So not all love stories are reciprocated at the same magnitude they were given. The anger a person feels towards an ex is most times a hidden love story, a pure love.
And when they can’t automatically turn off that love they felt for the other person, they simply cover it up with hate, because no one wants to keep loving a person who doesn’t love them back, and continue to look weak. one thing no one wants is to appear weak to a person who is taking advantage of their love.
Conclusion
So the next time you, your friend or your sibling is seen speaking about your Ex, in such a hurting way, calling them names, saying things that hurt, rather than simply narrating their experience, without being objective towards your ex-partner.
Then simply realise that there is something there. This is not just the hate, don’t just listen to what is being said and felt, It is a cover for what they feel. This is because people hurt you more, based on how much they mean to you.
When a person means a lot to you, you feel more hurt than when a person doesn’t feel close to you.
Love is a beautiful thing, so don’t torture yourself by spending too much time covering it up, rather than giving up, and allowing yourself to experience the beauty, the gift of pure love. After all is said and done, love is a beautiful feeling, it is even best, when your love is reciprocated.
