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One way to shield your kids from the impact of a failed relationship
One way to shield your kids from the effects of a failed relationship
It is a beautiful day to talk about the strong women who are handling the job of two humans as destined by God almighty. Regretting the ended relationship that should have been for life, now something that she is recovering from, a failed relationship.
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A natural thing a single parent encounters often is the constant need not to associate a certain negative feeling with the memory of their failed relationship with the other parent. There have been cases where a parent is weaponising the child or children that have come from the relationship.
People feel the need to get back at a person they were in a relationship with. People always struggle to appear happy after their relationship ends. A need to prove to the world that you are happier after the marriage ends. This is seen all over social media. when this doesn’t work, then they go into the weaponising the children.
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These are innocent children who didn’t have a direct responsibility in the relationship but ended up being the weapon against each parent.
As a single parent, navigating the challenges of raising kids after a failed relationship can be overwhelming. You have all kinds of thoughts cross your mind, where you wonder if your life would have been better, a lot better if you did not have children. Maybe, just maybe moving on would have been easier, and also the burden would have been less.
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You could sometimes wonder if your struggles would have been drastically reduced if there weren’t kids involved, or even accuse, or blame the kids for the end of the relationship. You wonder If kids created the gap between you and your spouse.
However, one of the most significant concerns is how to shield your kids from the negative impact of the breakup. Children often struggle to cope with the emotional fallout of their parent’s separation, and it’s essential to take proactive steps to protect them. It is not fair to either blame the kids, weaponise them, or even punish them for your failed marriage, relationships, and plan.
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One thing is very constant, and that is the fact that the breakup/divorce does not just affect the couple breaking up, the children who are the result of the union will also be affected if not more. Children from broken marriages are often overlooked and their emotions or reactions are downplayed, and only get considered when they become rebellious, which is often done for some attention.
1. The Importance of Co-Parenting
Co-parenting is a crucial aspect of parenting, a necessary step that follows the end of a relationship or marriage with children, where children are produced, there must be a post-relationship plan after the marriage ends.
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Whoever lives with the kids, will take up the task of shielding your kids from the impact of the failed relationship. You get to smile when you don’t feel like it, and laugh when you find nothing funny because you need to appear happy and peaceful to the kids.
When both parents work together to provide a stable and loving environment, children are more likely to adjust to the new family dynamic, so parents are eager to have their kids understand the new way of life.
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However, co-parenting can be challenging, especially when it is not peaceful because each parent wants something that the other parent is not willing to let go of, it results in a power tussle, a hand of lawyers are enriched, and enemies are made.
2. One Effective Way to Shield Your Kids
So, what’s the one effective way to shield your kids from the impact of a failed relationship? The sudden hatred, the ill feeling towards someone that used to be your all. The new level of meanness milestone unlocked, How do you shield your children from being targeted at one person? The impact of the hurt, the bitterness and the intentional moves to cause pain, since they say when two elephants fight, the grass suffers. The children are the grass in this case, and they are the real reason to be cordial towards each other.
After a divorce or breakup, the battle for the happiest parent starts on social media, they need to move on faster than the other person, starts. The answer lies in maintaining a Business-Like, co-parenting relationship to protect the kids from the mean arrows of bitter former partners.
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This means that the gut feeling to cause pain and hurt towards the other is subdued and replaced by civil behaviour. This is always easier said than done, because there are various reasons why relationships end, and while some end it amicably, others feel cheated and always looking to get even.
In this case, they throw caution to the wind and refuse to be nice or understanding in any way, towards each other.
So, a “business-like” co-parenting relationship means that you and your ex-partner interact with each other in a professional, respectful, and detached manner. You know, no-strings-attached kind of thing. This approach helps to minimise conflict, reduce tension, and negative targets, to create a more stable environment for your kids.
3. How To Maintain A “Business-Like
Maintaining a “business-like” co-parenting relationship requires effort, commitment, and a willingness to put your kids’ needs and safety first. Here are some tips to help you achieve this:
- Communicate Effectively: When interacting with your ex-partner, focus on the issues at hand, avoiding emotional or personal topics. Use “I” statements instead of “you” statements, which can come across as accusatory.
- Set Clear Boundaries: Establish clear guidelines and expectations for co-parenting, including communication protocols, scheduling, and decision-making processes.
- Prioritize Your Kids’ Needs, not Yours: Always put your kids’ needs first, making decisions that benefit them, even if it means compromising with your ex-partner.
- Avoid Conflict: Steer clear of arguments and conflicts, especially in front of your kids. If disagreements arise, try to resolve them through calm and respectful communication.
- Show Respect: Treat your ex-partner with respect, even if you don’t agree on everything. Avoid criticizing or badmouthing each other in front of your kids.
- Seek Support: Don’t be afraid to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist if you’re struggling to maintain a “business-like” co-parenting relationship.
4. Benefits of a “Business-Like” Co-Parenting Relationship
Maintaining a “business-like” co-parenting relationship can have numerous benefits for your kids, from ensuring that they transition from a two-parent household to a single-parent household. It reduces stress for the children, increases their sense of security, Improves their emotional well-being, enhances their ability to cope with the challenges of a parent’s failed relationship, and helps them get back to having a better relationship with both parents.
Conclusion
Divorces happen out of control sometimes, other times a decision was taken by both parties, while the rest of the time, one party was blindsided. In all of this, one thing is sure, and that is the interest of the people, the children, who came into existence as a result of the union, should be assisted in transitioning alongside the new reality.
Shielding your kids from the impact of a failed relationship requires effort, commitment, and a willingness to put their needs first. By maintaining a “business-like” co-parenting relationship, you can reduce conflict, create a more stable environment, and promote your kids’ emotional well-being. Remember, co-parenting is a journey, and it’s okay to take it one step at a time, especially when kids are involved.
